There I was, virtually self-flagellating by surveying the post ‘Brexit-Day’ fall-out on Twitter, engaging in a bit myself, when I was fortunate to come across a tweet from our former Chancellor of the Exchequer, George Osborne.

I very nearly choked on my cup of tea.

“Trying to convince you various fiascos were triumphs”. Yes. He really did use those words.

Once I’d picked myself up off the floor and reattached part of my rib-cage, I ascertained that Osborne’s tweet was directed to BBC reporter, Carole Walker, who retires from serving the broadcaster today after 37 years.

We should obviously take this opportunity to wish Carole every success for her future, and thank her for her long-term contribution to the field of journalism.

We should probably also point out what a complete plonker George Osborne is.

I could not help myself. I replied to Mr Osborne personally:

“Happy memories”? Well Mr Osborne, your “happy memories” acting as an Agent Provocateur, openly attempting to deceive those who would keep the British public informed, are actually pretty distasteful to some of us. Certainly to those who still perceive honesty and transparency as a good thing, and/or the most important qualities we want to see in a politician.

Yes… all politicians lie and use ‘spin’, and to expect anything else some might argue is unrealistic. We’ve all seen House of Cards on Netflix, after all. (Possibly even the original British version too, which makes a Tory comparison more palatable.) But perhaps it’s this exact flippancy about dishonesty, as so marvellously demonstrated by the man who once controlled Britain’s finances, that’s enabled this age of ‘moral bankruptcy’ and zero accountability we’re currently facing. Down the barrel of an economic shotgun.

Politicians of his ilk are literally laughing in our faces.

The “fiasco” of Tory government

Yes Mr Osborne, your government was indeed a “fiasco”. As were, I imagine, your party conferences. It is little wonder. Not only because we know how much you were spending on champagne, but because we now know your party was virtually a breeding ground akin to the movie Aliens: a smuggling ground for politicians secretly more UKIP than UKIP. (A theory one might argue demonstrated in full by the recent resignation of Douglas Carswell.)

I of course refer to those leading Tories who argued certain positions for days/months/years on end, particularly regarding the issue of EU membership, and then u-turned completely overnight – contradicting literally everything they’d formerly argued. Seriously, how can you EVER trust a politician, or in fact any human being who does that??

Vying for that ‘top spot of hypocrisy’ are Boris Johnson, the man who arguably almost single-handedly swung the whole referendum, and Theresa May, our now Prime Minister, who is allegedly trying hard to do away with images like this:

It’s ironic the split in the Labour party has been so heavily targeted and used as a smokescreen by the Conservatives, considering a section of their party basically committed a coup.

Who then, in turn, went on to enforce a coup on the whole of the country.

Glutton for punishment

You’d maybe think the man would have the good sense to lay low after his most recent public flogging. As if Osborne’s responsibilities as MP for Tatton (and the salary associated) were not enough, he was also ‘gifted’ the role of Editor at The Evening Standard, despite lacking any training/skill/experience as a journalist whatsoever. It was a deeply unpopular and questionable move, not only to the British public, but even Theresa May called the decision into question. (Though to my sensibilities, any challenge to the Ice Queen herself, a woman who uses citizens’ rights and international security as bargaining chips, is arguably a good thing.)

The only slogan these Tories do seem to agree on, is we’re supposedly “all in it together”. If that’s the case, it seems remarkably callous that top writing/editorial jobs should go to unqualified people who already earn what many of us would see as a small fortune for their existing vocations, when so many professional and creative people would yearn for the opportunity.

Certainly, if that’s the Tory idea of an economy that “works for all of us” in post-Brexit Britain, we should probably all start stockpiling tinned goods right about now.

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