There’s an old proverb, most widely known from its paraphrasing in the 1995 film, The Usual Suspects:

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.

It’s actually based on a saying by the French philosopher, Charles Baudelaire. (But be warned – providing that level of detail might mean not getting invited back to dinner parties.)

In essence, what the philosophy suggests, is the best defence for an immoral/illicit or heinous scheme is denying its very existence. To ridicule the suggestion as ‘fantastical’, ‘far-fetched’, ‘superstitious’ etc. In modern context, the same philosopher would probably argue some of what many deem ‘tin-foil hat conspiracy theories’ could well be true after all. Not-so-secret secrets, hiding in plain sight.

It’s a persuasive and pragmatic philosophy – not ‘loony’ at all. It’s also a technique reflected in military strategies over centuries, documented by writers such as Machiavelli and Sun Tzu: the notion of ‘misdirection’, deceiving the opponent as to the true make-up and whereabouts of an armed force until it is too late. Politics are a war, no mistake. The two entities are not so far apart, and the same principles apply – probably more so the higher up the echelons you go.

It’s fair to say the Western world is in excessive political turmoil at present (certainly beyond anything I’ve seen in my lifetime). No less so than in our Dis-United Kingdom. And there’s no shortage of ‘conspiracy theories’ as to what could actually be going on with this snap General Election.

Let’s look at a couple of the prominent ones.

The ‘problem’, and what doesn’t add up

Sorry readers, whether you want Brexit or not, few could deny it’s turned our country upside f**king down. It’s unleashed pure hatred and nationalism, provided pseudo-moral authority to bigots, alienated us from our closest neighbours in mainland Europe, and put us in the pocket of tyrants far worse than those we apparently despise so much in Brussels. It’s divided families and friends, and cast the future of millions of people into jeopardy. And perhaps worse than anything else, it could well deliver Brits into the hands of an irremovable far-right/one-party Tory state. 

However, here’s the thing. Theresa May and her Conservatives could well now be realising the enormity, and simply impossible mandate of what they’re supposed to deliver Brits with Brexit. The whole ‘Leave’ campaign was based on fairytales, and soon the chickens are gonna come home to roost. They know full well leaving the EU and single market under current circumstances is economic suicide, that the EU won’t play ball, and it’s not beyond the realms of possibility it could collapse the whole sodding country. Even more likely is it could break up the United Kingdom itself.

NB: No Conservative wants the break up of the Great British Union on their record in the annals of history, I guarantee it. Empire is what they’re all about.

Combine that with the fact millions of us are simply gobsmacked by the Tory manifesto. Even some Tories. It’s just so callous and so persecuting of the lesser fortunate, so shamelessly playing for the benefits of the upper classes and elites, it really does beggar belief – even by typical Conservative standards. They’ve also become UKIP, making Cameron and Osborne seem like liberal freedom fighters of yesteryear.

The disabled, unemployed, doctors and nurses, teachers etc, they’ve all already been shafted, but in the past few days/weeks alone, May has deliberately targeted:

  • pensioners, their triple-lock pensions and fuel allowance,
  • anyone requiring nursing/social care who owns a home, forcing them to pay equity to the government (instead of passing on to next of kin),
  • increases to income tax and/or VAT, 
  • increases to interest rates on student loans,
  • refusal to increase the minimum wage,
  • reductions to corporation tax,
  • cuts to the NHS (won’t rule out privatisation),
  • no guarantee of rights for EU citizens living in the UK,
  • fines for employers who do employ foreign nationals,
  • reneged promises regarding the Levenson Enquiry, dropping all proposed restrictions on the Murdoch/Rothermere/Barclay tabloid press,
  • an entirely volunteered repeat-vote on fox-hunting, openly supporting the hugely unpopular blood-sport,
  • effectively re-legalising the immoral ivory trade for wealthy British antique dealers,
  • refusing another referendum for either Scotland or the Brexit deal,
  • refusal to debate publicly with the leader of the opposition, to speak openly with the press (locking them in cupboards, and staging her own publicity),
  • restrictions to what British citizens can see on the internet, introducing North Korea-style censorship and state propaganda,
  • gloating she would “absolutely” initiate a first-strike nuclear attack,
  • sweeping all Tory campaign ‘mis-spending’ under the carpet, on account of recent legal vindication (ignoring there was nonetheless gross and unresolved over-spending).

Probably a whole load more I’ve forgotten too. ‘Policies’ more at home in a Dickensian novel or dictator handbook than 21st century Britain. 

It’s just hideous. And it begs the question – who could possibly vote for this??

Meanwhile, we’ve got Boris on the loose, humiliating us all over the world like a complete and utter f**k-nugget. Some are saying, it’s actually like the Conservatives want to lose this election.

Theory A: The ‘poison chalice’

That’s basically the essence of it. They want to lose. The Tories can no longer polish the turd of Brexit, they know the country is absolutely f**ked – they’ve pushed us off the cliff, and now wish to be as far removed from the inevitable bloodbath as humanly possible. They literally cannot deliver their vacuous promises. By now handing over to Labour (or possibly the Lib Dems, if you believe in miracles) to pick up the pieces, they literally pass the sh*t-laden buck. Then, having spent two years setting Jeremy Corbyn up to look like an incompetent fool, they simply blame the fallout on him. It would make quite a convincing narrative actually. Even more disturbingly, if things really fell apart, it might pave the way for an even more aggressive and nationalistic Tory/UKIP government to finish the job in the future.

And of course, if the non-Tory party in power decided to reverse Brexit – put a halt on the whole daisy-chain off a cliff thing, they’d probably risk actual civil war in this country. The nationalists would tear the place apart. Nigel Farage could well end up becoming the equivalent of Darth Vader.

Backing this theory somewhat is another good point: if Theresa May had just shut the hell up and said nothing, even if the Tories hadn’t bothered to produce a manifesto, or had promised every household a free kitten and a PS4 – they would probably have wiped the floor. Instead, May is revealing her true colours, and making people think twice.

Theory B: ‘The super-villain has to show off ‘

As it’s been joked in countless spoofs, when the super-villain is absolutely confident they’ve won and the forces of good have been defeated; when Bond is tied up, with a laser about to solder his bollocks to the floor, the villain reveals the entire sordid plan.

In other words, as many have said from the word go, Theresa May simply knows she cannot lose this election. (Or at least believes as much.) Given the alternatives are apparently so derisory and so ‘pathetic’, she could quite frankly take a big steamy dump outside Number 10 then roll around in it barking like a dog – the right wing press and average Brit would still think she’s great. (‘Strong and stable’, no doubt.) Let’s face it, half of them wouldn’t be paying attention any way.

In that spirit, she may as well try and enact the unabashed Tory ‘Utopia’. No need for subtlety, or doing it in stages. If she can’t, or at any rate won’t lose the election (see Theory C), she may as well start to kill off the surplus population and enforce state censorship straight off? To do otherwise would be looking a gift-horse in the mouth. It’s opportunism of the most extreme, insidious manner.

Theory C: ‘The devil who doesn’t exist’

This one is more extreme, and would probably receive more ridicule. But really, what actually is there to stop the Tories rigging the election? Or even, simply mis-reporting the results of the vote? Who ultimately reports the figures? Who are the counters employed by? Yes, no doubt there are checks in place to protect the democratic process – probably the same sort of checks designed to protect us from press monopolies, and populist-motivated constitutional changes – eg: checks that have clearly failed.

Before the recent council elections, there were even memes going around telling people to bring their own pens, instead of using the pencils provided at voting stations. (Even for a ‘conspiracy’ I think that’s a bit far-fetched… surely easier to simply bin votes, or not count them than physically change?) 

But you could not blame someone for looking at the level of public support Jeremy Corbyn receives, really looking at the hope, love and optimism he inspires among huge swathing crowds across the UK – while our cowardly prime minister skittles about dodging the press and the public – and not see a correlation with the much-trumpeted MSM line that “Corbyn is un-electable, everybody hates him, everybody loves Theresa May.” It just doesn’t quite add up. Whereas the Tories want to crucify just about everybody but the rich, Labour only want to tax more of those earning £80k a year plus. The elite 10%. So how the hell can so many turkeys vote for Christmas??

One possible answer is, they don’t. It’s all a smokescreen.

It was Nazi minister Joseph Goebbels who famously said:

If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it.

By determined government cherry-picking of every TV audience, every news report, by ensuring vested interests for the majority of mainstream politicians and political analysts/reporters etc, are we as a populace literally primed for a big fat lie of colossal proportion?

Could we, the people of Britain, be persuaded by the devil he does not in fact exist?

Get involved! Tell us what YOU think? 

We’ll publish the results.

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